It's only Monday and I am so ready for this week to be over with. Yesterday was particularly hard as my Dad came to town to go to church with us 'for one last time'. After church, we went for lunch and then said our good-byes on the front step of the restaurant. I was a blubbering idiot and he was trying to be so strong for me. I just remember him holding me, whispering..."It's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay". And reflecting on this still makes me cry!
My biggest apprehension about this whole move is that I feel like I'm letting people down by leaving. My family, my friends, my clients and my "ministries" at church. I have felt a lot of love in this whole endeavor and it's a great thing! But it is particularly hard when I can feel how tightly people are holding on. It reminds me of Fall, the colors are beautiful and there is a slight change in the weather. With that, leaves start falling and temps drop...things start dying away and then winter comes. But THEN comes glorious spring! If it wasn't for this dying off, we wouldn't have this beautiful spring! Please let the "beautiful spring" in this adventure of my life start soon!
In two more days, I will close up my massage therapy studio and walk away from some pretty incredible people, my clients. In five days, I will move away from two of the most important people of my life, my niece and nephew. In a week and a half, I will voluntarily separate from my beloved spouse as he returns to Iowa for work until he finds something in New Mexico. Please Lord, let this "beautiful spring" start soon!
Monday, July 26, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Reinventing Myself
In about 10 days and 20 some hours, I get to begin the journey of reinventing myself. On July 31st, Roger and I will pull out of hometown Iowa and head to a new life in Santa Fe, New Mexico. How many people have this opportunity to "start over"? I am simply thrilled!
Of course, this is a bittersweet re-invention. I am leaving behind family (particularly a beautiful niece and a loveable nephew); my clients, who have been so faithful to my massage business; my "church family" and many friends. This is the longest we have lived anywhere - and we've never had a network of people in our lives like we do here. So yes, it is bittersweet.
The possibilities are endless! And while I know there will be some limitations on my life due to being in school full-time, it still feels limitless. I can already feel my mind expanding both with the knowledge I will gain in classes but also just an openess of the spirituality of the place. On one of my trips to Santa Fe, a shuttle drive told me that the state motto is "The Land of Enchantment. But really it should be called the 'Land of Entrapment', because once you get here, you can't leave". I believe this to be true. There is something hallowed about that place - and I GET TO LIVE THERE! Bring on all the opportunities and possibilities I can stand - I AM READY!
Of course, this is a bittersweet re-invention. I am leaving behind family (particularly a beautiful niece and a loveable nephew); my clients, who have been so faithful to my massage business; my "church family" and many friends. This is the longest we have lived anywhere - and we've never had a network of people in our lives like we do here. So yes, it is bittersweet.
The possibilities are endless! And while I know there will be some limitations on my life due to being in school full-time, it still feels limitless. I can already feel my mind expanding both with the knowledge I will gain in classes but also just an openess of the spirituality of the place. On one of my trips to Santa Fe, a shuttle drive told me that the state motto is "The Land of Enchantment. But really it should be called the 'Land of Entrapment', because once you get here, you can't leave". I believe this to be true. There is something hallowed about that place - and I GET TO LIVE THERE! Bring on all the opportunities and possibilities I can stand - I AM READY!
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